What is success?
I want to tell you about success to me & how my view of it changed drastically. I used to think I was defined by all these things I made up in my head to make me “successful”. I got accolade after accolade to prove my worth. I gained degree upon degree to gain this “success”.
I got a job where I was making a lot of money. And it consumed me. I was successful. I was rising to the top! I had made it! (in my mind). I was surrounded by people who also were successful and every conversation was about the money and the stocks and the next purchase and the next thing that is going to bring this happiness that we so think is going to come.
Now, bring in my husband. I never really understood Nick as a person. He was unlike anyone I’d ever known. He loved to coach basketball and he wanted to work 24/7 and he never gave a damn about a dollar bill. He never worried about some big time D1 coaching job or landing some huge gig. He just wanted to coach basketball, wherever he could. But, he still didn’t make sense to me. He seemed to go against the grain of what society tells us is important… money, power, status (Those were the things that I seemed to hold worth in for so long). I didn't really know any different.
… And then I met Nick’s father and he made a lot more sense. Nick’s dad ran a Fortune 500 company. He was the epitome of worldly success. He made billion dollar deals happen & he traveled to D.C. most of his career…. and you know what?
YOU’D NEVER EVER EVER KNOW IT.
His every day attire is from the 1990’s and for the longest time, he drove a Toyota 4-runner with the side mirror duct-taped onto it. You know what Nick’s dads success was? It was his legacy, his kids. Over the years, I have watched him pour his entirety into his kids and their friends lives.
See, I had a skewed view of success. I thought success was in my title or my career or my next accomplishment in life. I have learned that success comes in who we are. It is who we are as mothers and wives and friends. It is how we care for people and how we pour into people. It is the way we love others.